Snow Day!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday around 5 AM the snow began to fall and didn't stop until long after I went to bed. I think I heard we have had more snow this season in Texas than there has been here in the last 32 years. With all the snow on the ground there was no way we were gonna pass up this once/twice/maybe just maybe three times in a lifetime (living in TX) opportunity to build a snowman.

Little man had a blast shoveling snow and lasted an impressively long time outside in a cold we just don't seem to be built for. Eventually the extremities on our bodies became unbearably cold and we moved inside to enjoy the snow show from the comfort of the heated house. I should probably also give credit where credit is due in regard to that skiing snowman being chased?/built? by the crazy monkey in the tractor. My beginning snowman was first a giant cone and then after some wonderful advice on the proper snowman building techniques - it was a giant ball that was absolutely beautiful and then quickly realized to be WAY TOO HEAVY for me to actually pick and move to where the snowman wanted to be. Then Mr. Aries arrives and his creativity and desire to create took over gracing us with the skiing snowman.

It didn't take long before the snow falling outside took over the emotions of Mr. Aries and our day took a turn down a difficult road. Whereas I was awestruck with the pure beauty of white covering the outdoors, Mr. Aries could think of nothing but how the weather outside made him want to cuddle. The longer he sat watching the snow without having those cuddles the more angry he became at me, for what I'm doing to his family.

A sample of the conversations that took place over the day:

Mr. Aries - "Every single person in my life has abandoned me. You are no different. Now not only are you abandoning me just like everyone else but you are taking my son away too. You have no idea what it feels like to be abandoned or to have everything you love taken away from you."

Me - (in my heart I'm knowing - If I don't abandon you, I'm abandoning myself, and if I abandon myself I can never expect anything in my life to work out the way it could for me). I say - "I'm sorry. I can never know exactly what it feels like to be you. I have felt the pain of abandonment before, I understand how helpless it can feel. I'm here to help you if you need me, I'm here to listen and I'm willing to take responsibility for the consequences of doing what I need to do. The only difference is I can no longer help at the expense of myself."

With some time and some space the entire situation turned itself around. Next thing I know Mr. Aries is telling me how I deserve to be happy. He doesn't need or want me to change any of the decisions that I've made. He needs and wants me to follow my heart. He knows he will be okay, sometimes it just hurts more times than others. It still blows my mind how changing the old patterns we have in relationships, "miraculously" ;-) changes the outcomes.

I'm grateful for every opportunity I have to move toward the life I dream about. I'm thankful for every "sign" that continues to show me that following my heart is the way. Taking one step at a time, keeping the larger frame of my life in mind, has led me to accomplish some pretty great things in the last couple weeks!

Ran my first half marathon (with Shanna of course)! 2 hours 1 min 39 seconds and I'm already registered for my second as even though I finished the Texas Half I didn't exactly enjoy it. FREEZING COLD!!!

Got the long term sub job!

Found the perfect childcare for little man! I feel confident that the first day I drop him there I will not be overcome with sadness and worry the moment I arrive at my job. He's excited, I'm excited, I couldn't ask for anything more!!!